When the universe conspires

Dear Diary,

I was supposed to continue the sequel of my trying-hard-novel but words just don’t come out right.At some point in time I wanted to leave this site and re-activate my tumbler account.But then as I was discerning what really my main purpose for blogging is, I recalled how I came up with my title “Dear Diary”.Probably because I want to read what I write, I want to browse my past inputs and I find it very interesting and sometimes hilarious as to what on earth was I thinking way back?

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Love Life. My favorite topic ever since I had my first diary.And as much I want to share to you all what my heart feels right now I guess I’ll keep that as a mystery (virtually).It’s a self supporting heart as of this writing anyways so there’s nothing to share about.lol

Call me crazy but I’m really a hopeless romantic individual who believes in fairy tales and happy endings.Way back when I was still studying I was really fond of composing poems and endless daydreaming love stories.Romantic-comedy movies are always my thing.Watching fireworks. Candlelight dinner. Sunset by the beach.

I fell in and out of love twice and so my perception about this whole thing varied.

It’s something that you cannot tell your heart to feel or not to feel.It’s the spark, the magic and the butterflies in your stomach.It’s finding yourself smiling at the end of the day because you know you had fun, you where happy and you  had a good time with that person even if you just shared a small amount of time together.

At some point in time you would always need that someone to turn on to, someone who will never get tired listening to your stories, your confidant with your thousand thoughts and feelings.

But of course heart aches and heartbreaks are part of the package, and we cannot change that fact.Spells and potions won’t help as much as we want to; we just have to practice the art of acceptance.It’s reality that we cannot force to alter, because no matter how much we want something so badly,if it was not meant to last and worst not really bound to happen, it will never be. Never let yourself be blinded by the things that aren’t real. For you might end up losing all your emotional investments and worst loosing yourself. BUT! It’s not the end of the world; all of this life’s imperfection makes us stronger and wiser.  After all it’s going to be a one boring story if it doesn’t have any conflicts in it right?

Few nights ago, I remember dreaming about shooting stars, and what’s funny is I kept on wishing for the same thing, to finally be with that someone.

But you know what?  I think that the more we rush, the more things will slow down. It’s just a matter of changing your perspective to a positive one where you can find true happiness.

True love is out there waiting for you, just waiting for the perfect time for you.

The person you’ve been wishing, hoping and praying for will come into your life the least you expect it.

“And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

-Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

LIVE. LAUGH.LOVE

xoxo,

iamsuperpine

Leap of Faith

Dear Diary,

It has been an emotional ride for me for the past few days. At some point I think I was somehow out of my league that I couldn’t even remember where I left my phone or where I’m heading to. I couldn’t even tell if I’m sad or just feeling nothing at all. But when I remember the words of encouragement that my friends and family keeps on telling me, it never fail to inspire and cheer me up.

Happiness has always been a matter of choice. No matter how depressing the situation is, you got to find something good out of it, cause trust me, there is. There’s always one good piece of clothing in a bunch of “ukay-ukay” stuffs. It’s not an easy task but its worth giving a try. No one can pull your self-esteem up, no one but you. If you keep on negating things, you’ll end up losing the battle. The more you try to find out what went wrong the more opportunities you miss, as one my favorite song of Stacey Orrico goes:

“There’s gotta be more to life…
Than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I’m…
tripping’ out thinking’ there must be more to life
Well it’s life, but I’m sure… There’s gotta be more”

All of this things might sound a bit of a cliché but this is probably the secret of having a stress free life, where waking up every morning will always be exciting and you always have something to look forward to every single day.

Smile and everything will follow.

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

 

xoxo,
iamsuperpine

I cannot even write about it

Dear Diary,

I was trying on a dress that unfortunately doesn’t fit me, so got scolded and was told that I have been eating too much. It breaks my heart hearing this, for I haven’t been eating rice and dinner for the past 2 weeks. I have been depriving myself with fatty foods yet it still doesn’t show. Reality bites.

I love fashion and I do understand the fact that in this industry being a size 0 is a must, but in reality, in the world of a normal person, physical appearance would be the last thing someone would consider when looking for the right one.

Few nights ago, me and some of my guy friends where talking about the so-called standards when it comes to searching for a prospect partner.  And I was not surprised when they both answered “Inner Beauty”. Inner beauty where you don’t have to look anorexic just to be considered sexy, at your simplest form without make up, and with your PJ’s on that was bought at a mall sale.

And for someone to see that in you is a great help in redeeming self-esteem.

So whether or not I’ll have one piece of clothing that will fit me tomorrow I’m still glad I was given a chance to be part of a new designers launch.

—–

What will you do if you’re praying for something then it arrived seconds after you uttered your prayers? Amazing! I knew it !faith keeps me moving.

This kind of simple wishes coming true is one of my basic reason for waking up smiling every morning.

“When you do finally get what you want, the problem is there’s always someone that’s trying to take it away. And all that wanting makes us blind to the fact that things aren’t exactly what we think they are. Maybe it’s better sometimes to just get what you need. XOXO —Gossip Girl.”

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

Xoxo,

iamsuperpine

 

Insanity

Dear Diary,

This is insanity. I let one good opportunity slipped away. It has been my long time dream to join an event of my fave magazine but due to some unreasonable reasons I won’t be able to make it.  Well it’s actually a speed dating event, haha but you know I’m more after the experience of meeting the people behind my lifestyle bible. Cosmopolitan Magazine! Although speed dating is something new to me, I’m pretty much interested on joining but then again, time won’t allow me to. I’ll just move on with this.

So it was Valentine’s Day last Monday, and how was yours truly? Just fine. Went out with my friends to watch a very cheesy movie and then dined out after. See?this day can be fun for singles too. And thanks to my good friend (whom I haven’t seen for I think a decade already) for a pre-valentine gift, a beautiful bouquet of flowers was delivered at our doorstep. It was actually my first time to receive such and those kind of simple gestures never failed to make me smile.

Just had my first fashion show for 2011 last Saturday, it was a good one but I’m looking forward to join a show two weeks from now. I miss this! So I badly need to stop pigging out.

I’m out of words.

Life is beautiful. I’m thankful for my everyday blessings .Love Life?come what may.

I’m just so glad its weekend again!

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

Xoxo,

iamsuperpine

Stilettos Vs. Flops

Dear Diary,

While I was walking on my home, I was listening to Katy Perry’s Fireworks.

I seriously wanna shout, scream, and run like those in the video while the song was playing.

Yes, I do wanna run, not because I pigged out this day or I’m an athlete or something but I do wanna run as fast as I could so I can catch up with my thousand thoughts processing on my mind that time.Cause I was like an undated video card of a desktop computer that can’t be match to the latest Operating system there is.

I apologize for being too technical but I just somehow want to remind myself  how I patiently spent four years of my life trying to understand the field Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak (Kinda wish Zuckerberg was born much earlier though) etc. But unfortunately even if I’m a social network savvy, still I just couldn’t appreciate this kind of things,and that left me hanging to the point of deciding whether I would like to wear flats or stilettos.

I  love stilettos but they sometimes hurts, I like flip-flops but they are a bit deglamorizing.

But either way, it is outside of ones comfort zone.

To be continued..

xoxo,

iamsuperpine

Odynophobia

Dear Diary,

Here I go again, day dreaming like a 5^th grader, where all I think about is getting married to my favorite boy band member. Well at present I’m still inclined to celebrities but my hopeless romantic dreams where a bit different now of course.

Is it because I accidentally bumped my head at the wall this morning? – à(stupid me T_T)

Or is it because someone shifted my not so good mood this morning to a very cheesy day dreaming afternoon? And who could it be?

Subject # 1
The Chapter I’ve always wanted to recall.
You barely said hi anymore, today you just said thanks and smiled.

Subject # 2
You’re just too good to be true.
You’re like the louboutin pumps that I’ve always wanted but damn too pricey.
Well what can I do, you’re just not that in to me.
Subject # 3
I love basketball but I don’t like rebounds.
Yes you’re cute and sweet.
Please stay there I need someone to talk to.

Subject # 4
Hey Clark Kent, Louise Lane here.
The Silver Screen is waiting.

Then again with all this things in mind, I should remind myself that I should never assume.

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and here I go again planning to lock myself at my room with lights shut off, so I won’t be able to see lovers on the streets, balloons, teddy bears, flowers and chocolates.Bitter!lol.

 

I’ll LIVE.LAUGH hard.LOVE someday

 

xoxo,

iamsuperpine

Wake up!

It was a cold breezy morning; I was on my way to work. I was being the usual me.

My favorite songs of the week are on my playlist, again. I was a bit in a hurry because we were scheduled to have a trip down south to meet some of our clients.

See whenever the jeepney passed by this church I say a little prayer , that today is going to be a good day and everything’s going to be ok and just fine. Indeed it started good, I made it on time.

10 minute make-up, fixed my hair, checked emails and hastily went to the car and had my breakfast on the way.

After an hour and a half we arrived at the busiest street of the Metro.  I was still trying to figure out where to head first cause it was actually my first time to go there, with my high heels on, I was walking around pretending I know where I’m going, I’m bringing along with me my heavy tote bag, my itinerary for the day and my phone that keeps on buzzing me out once in a while.  So I headed first on this commercial building, where I have 3 appointments w/ my previous clients.  And being the “usual” me , I wasn’t looking on my way cause I was talking to someone on the phone and out of nowhere ,someone bump off me,  and there goes my phone that went into pieces on to the floor.  At my dismay, I said the F word a bit loud and I‘m at my most awkward moment. Damn. With glam and poised, I composed myself and picked up my phone, right then I went straight to the elevator and headed to the 22^nd floor for my first rendezvous . The receptionist told me to wait at the lobby , I was few minutes behind schedule so my contact person entertained her next appointment, and yes I waited for twenty boring minutes thinking  if only  I arrived earlier and my phone didn’t flew and was scattered into pieces I was probably having my coffee right now and closing deals.

And finally I saw Ms. EVP walking down the hall and talking to an Andrew-Garfield-look-a-like, need I say more? Haha hottie

I was actually expecting for us to be introduced formally but it seems like he was on a hurry, so he went off  the way , as  I greet my client with my warmest smile and ask her about that guy, who happened to be my clients company consultant.  And that hottie guys name was Mark.  All throughout the day my mood was enlightened as I moved on and meet my clients’ one after the other, thanks to “Mark”. I was kind of disappointed though cause I was somewhat hoping to see him again.

After my last destination I dropped by at a coffee shop to order my favorite decaf frapped and by surprised in front of me was Mark, without any doubt it was him indeed! I was about to approach him but then my phone ring(yes, it’s still working), I was planning to reject it but “The only girl in the world” tone kept on playing louder and louder, I was trying to modulate my voice  so I can sound like a girly like professional just in case he was listening but things started strange when he was looking at me every once in a while (thank god for the long line.lol) After I took the call, he stared at me again ( I hope I‘m not blushing though) , he talked to me and said he was sorry about this morning, and asked myself ,sorry about what? Then he recalled the incident where my phone flew like super man this morning, soooooooooo it was him!

And instead of recalling the incident I was just smiling and staring at him the whole time and telling him that it was ok. He paid for my coffee (so sweet) and as we head outside we had this chit-chat , to seize the moment  I pretended naive and told him I’m not quite sure where’s the exact location of our car.  He was kind enough to walk with me and guide me to whatever the place is. lol.  At the back of my mind I was giggling, because after 4 long years it’s just now that I enjoyed a long walk with someone (even if my feet hurts so bad already).  He was a street smart kind of guy so that got me interested more and more. This is it! This might be the one I’ve been waiting for 4 long agonizing years!

We exchange numbers (yuppie!!!)  , until I felt that something was wrong with my shoes, we went down the underpass and bam! My heels got broke, went off-balance, I fell down the stairs in the most humiliating way, and then I went unconscious.

After a while, I opened my eyes then I realized,

It was only just a dream.

Bestfriends 18

Dear Diary,

Last Sunday as i was watching my friend walk down the aisle, I couldn’t help not to cry while From This Moment on by Shania Twain was being sung.( Because she’s finally getting hitched while I’m still searching for the one.lol.just kidding) I was crying cause she was crying the whole time she was walking (they are tears of joy though) maybe because we shared a lot of things already that’s why I got emotional as well and now that she’ll be facing a new chapter in her life things will never be the same again.

That same day, got the chance to bond with my H.S buddies again. These are the people whom I’ve shared a lot sentiments and wonderful moments with,  so having a rare chance of having the group almost complete is a priceless opportunity to cherish.  It’s with them where I get to laugh out loud , laugh where your cheeks would ache much,have a smudged make-up and my favorite part is to make fun of each other non-stop.

We’ve been through a lot of things but thank God we were able to surpass the hardest friendship test there is.These are the kind of friends  that you don’t get to see that often but you know they’ll always be there. And whenever we get the chance to hangout, “No dull moments” guaranteed. Although past lovers has awkward moments but never the less “past romance stories” now remains as  a  laughing matter to most of us. And I think that justifies our name as a group. Best friends 18.18 individuals with 18 different personalities that were bound by fate to have each other and justifies the essence of having  true friends around you.

DANIEL, JET, ARIS, CARPS, DAVS, EDZ, PAUL,
JHEC, VHAL, JHE, CHE, AIKS,NOEMI,RHOS, ANN
PINES, ECHA AND SHEE.

“Even though we’ve changed and we’re all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we’ll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we’re not all — still best friends. loveyou all.. ♥” -Jenny E.
—-

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

xoxo,

iamsuperpine

P.S didn’t get the bridals bouquet cause I don’t have  a prospect at the venue.haha

Mission 20-11

Dear Diary,

It’s the 7th day of 2011 and finally I came up with my resolutions/goals for the year, so my list goes like this.

1.  Live a Healthy Life
-Ive been very conscious with my weight ever since cause I hate it when clothes wont fit anymore so I eat less
than the average but then I realized it’s very unhealthy to pursue such practice so I’ll do everything in moderate.
2. Incline myself in reading books, mags and articles on the net
-I find Self-help/motivational articles to be very helpful,for I was able to have a positive outlook in life. Fashion Mags do help a lot too,
3. Blog and revive poetry.
-Of course I would still write on my hard bound diary but blogging is a stress-release activity for me so I’m planning to do it at least once in a week. ( I saw a shirt on the mall that says “nobody cares about your blog”-well hey bloggers dont care about you ). And I miss writing poems and short stories too so I’ll try to revive that.
4. Practice fierceness.
-Because I’m this pretty little kind girl in tough times so I felt the need to be fierce!
5. Pursue my dream job
-I wanna become a flight attendant, I really do
6. Travel. Out of Town or Out of the Country Maybe?
-I had fun going to CamSur last year with my HS buddies so I demand a repeat!haha and visit other places too of course.
7. Budget and Save
-I don’t wanna end up getting broke after partying or shopping, so I’ll try my very best to budget and save
8. Discover a new hobby/skill/interest
-This sounds exciting.
9.Reward myself with :
-An Mp3 player or Ipod Touch and  a personal laptop;shoes;clothes;bag;a day at the salon or spa hihi
10.Be an angel in disguise
-inspire or help those who are in need of encouragements and also an angel don’t gossip and judges much right?
11.Stand tall and be proud and smile
-At times my mood swings drag down my self esteem so I don’t wanna have that way of thinking.

So that’s about it, hopefully I’ll be able to accomplish all of this. The year is just starting and I have a long way to go. And let me not forget my theme for this year GET RICH.BE SEXY.FIND LOVE!

*just read that from cosmopolitan magazine Philippines and I find it very inspiring and a great driving force

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

xoxo,
iamsuperpine

When I’m thinking too much

Dear Diary,

I ate a lot today,boooo >_<

My friend was so happy with his new lover.

I wanna watch Bruno Mars live on April.

I wanna be a flight attendant but I’m an IT graduate and an IT professional makes a lot of money and I wanna be a flight attendant.

I have 99 followers on twitter.cute

I wanna talk to this someone on Facebook but I’m to shy to say Hi.

I also wanna talk to this other someone on Facebook but  don’t know what to say.

Yes. This is mere infatuation.My love life runs slow like our internet connection.

I find this reporter cute. Thank you twitter.

I wanna go on leave tomorrow so I can clean my room before new year, but I’m too lazy, so id rather report for work.LOL

Finally got my Starbucks Planner last Christmas.And then what?Am I good at planning?Is a planner a document for your plans?or is it a tool for writing down random thoughts  that I tend to forget?

I wanna buy a new pair of jeans, a black tote bag, a wrist watch , a 4 inch black pumps and a cute pair of gladiator sandals.

I’m über duper sleepy.gtg

LIVE.LAUGH.LOVE

xoxo,

iamsuperpine